BEST VALENTINES DAY EVER!!

So I really don't know where so start. As you know last August we started the process to do foster care adoption. We have done interviews, classes, home studies, house repairs and more all in hopes of receiving a placement. We have been scouring the internet looking for children who needed a home and never heard anything back....We started to feel like it would be a very long time, until Monday...

 

We were going about our normal day when we saw we had a missed call. Upon further investigation (lol) we found out that it was from a Utah caseworker who wanted to see if we would take two kids; an 8 year old boy and 4 year old girl. We were surprised and nervous all in one. We made the decision a matter of prayer, after all that is how we got into this deal in the first place right?! Our hearts were full and our eyes brimmed with tears when we decided that absolutely YES we would take them!

 

So the adventure began. They asked us to pick them up Tuesday at 11am after court when they would call us. We went straight out to buy the proper booster seats and get their beds completely ready. When Tuesday came we eagerly awaited the phone call to come, but it never came. The court hearing that had been scheduled to put the kids in our care was cancelled. So we kept waiting...Wednesday was the BIG DAY! We were told to pick them up at the office at 4:30 pm. We decided that since they were not legally free (able to be adopted right away) that we would approach the situation as an opportunity to love and serve these kids for how ever long they needed us...We thought this would help us keep from getting too attached. We got Tate and Emerson and walked into the front room. There they were. I wanted to grab them and never let them go. They were so sweet, so perfect, so precious. They were all of the sudden MINE and I didn't want to let them out of my sight. Never in my life have I experienced such instant love. Even when I had Tate and Emerson my love grew and grew as they grew inside me. And by the time they were born I loved them more than words. The love I have with these kiddos was that all in one instant. Incredible.

 

They were quiet at first but it didn't take long until they were talking our ears off! We took them to get dinner and then on the biggest shopping spree I've ever been on! They only had the clothes on their backs at the time. As they picked things out, their eyes lit up and their personalities blossomed. It was amazing to see it unfold. The whole drive home they kept asking where we lived. When we said in a house they couldn't believe we had an actual house and that we had stayed in one place for two years. When they came inside they were like kids on Christmas morning. They wanted to see everything. They had never seen a house like it. Little big man (using nick-names to protect identities) said "wow I've never seen a house like this! I love your house!" I said "this is your house too." Tears filled his tiny eyes and he said, REALLY?! They thanked us for their beds, they had never had their own. To think I was complaining about not having my basement done the day before. They teach me so much. We had family prayer, all six of us. We blessed each child by name. Little Big Man was crying and have us huge hugs and just kept saying thank you. They slept like little darling rocks.

 

Two days in, they call us mom and dad and we love them more than words! So much for taking it a day at a time. But they deserve our full love whether they are here for a day or forever. They think they will be legal risk additive placements which means they expect well be able to adopt them but we won't know for sure until the end of February.....actually probably a lot longer than that...court stuff takes forever. These precious kids have changed me forever.

 

Special quotes:

Little Big Man (he's tiny sane size as his sister)
"I want to be called "(his name) the Ricks"
 

Essa
"I've never had a momma that taught me how to wash my hair and body! I love you!"

 

I'm so blessed.

These are a few of my FAVORITE things...

We finally got around to taking some family pictures today before Tanner's sister Hadlee's baptism! It was a great day and pretty cute kiddos to show for it if I do say so myself!



Merry Christmas!

We hope everyone had a great Christmas this year! We can't believe it has already come and gone! We're still getting use to writing 2013 on things... I don't know where time goes! We had a pretty good Christmas this year! Christmas Eve was at our house again, we had Tanners family and my family all over to celebrate! We had yummy food and opened all of the PJs! We put the kids in bed on time at 8 which was a Christmas miracle! Tate kept asking to go to bed I guess all the fun exhausted him! Santa came and went by 9pm! I have a feeling I should enjoy that while it lasts because I don't think we're going to be as lucky next year!

Christmas day my parents and Hunter came over to Skype with my brother Tyson serving his mission in Sweden (click the link to the right to view his blog with more info!) it was awesome to hear from him! I'm so lucky to have brothers who are such amazing brothers and uncles to my kids and such amazing examples. If I could be half the person they are, I'd be lucky.

Then, we went over to the Ricks to see all of the aunties and those Grandparents! (and uncle Dallin) It is always fun to visit them but the kiddos were again exhausted from the day's festivities so we ran home, took naps and went to my parents (along with Tanner's parents) and had our annual homemade pizza Christmas dinner! It was great! We are so blessed that both of our families celebrate the holidays together! We can be with everyone at the same time! We are so blessed to have such amazing family and a such a big support system! We love them all and they are the ones we are most grateful for this holiday season!

 

Also, we'd like to give a shout out to Tanner's Grandma Ricks. She passed away last week and her funeral is tomorrow. She was his last living grandparent; she was such an amazing example of what it is to love and nurture your family and teach your children and grandchildren the way they should go. She had a strong testimony of the gospel and is an excellent example to all of us. She had a long bought with her health after being diagnosed with a brain tumor  4 1/2 years ago on our wedding day. We will miss her, but she is reunited with her husband Emerson Llyod Ricks who passed away a few months before our baby Emerson was born. We feel and see their legacy through our children. They will always be loved and missed.

 

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!



FINALLY....waiting....

It has been 8 weeks since our licensor came to inspect our house and interview us and now we are FINALLY....OFFICIALLY....awaiting a placement.

Here are the steps we have taken since the beginning of August (5 months) to begin the actual waiting process which could be anywhere from a few weeks to a year...

 

1. Meet with a recruiter

2. Take 8,  4 hour long classes through the month of September/ prepare our house for the home study

3. Meet with the licensor and have her inspect our house. She then types up our official home study and submits it to the Department of Child and Family Services.

4. DCFS reviews our home study through the board and decides to accept or deny our application to become foster parents....they accepted thank goodness!

5. Meet with the Resource Family Consultant (basically the caseworker that represents the foster parents, children in care are represented by their own caseworkers) She goes over things with us and does another interview

 

6. WAIT for a placement.

 

That's right, we've been waiting to wait. But now, it's official, any day we could get a call with a placement (though it will likely take a LOT of days...) but we're excited to get to the waiting part. Now, we just pray everyday for the children who will someday be in our home, that they will feel a sense of peace and comfort and that we will be prepared to welcome them, love them, and meet their needs as they become part of our family (hopefully) forever, or maybe just for awhile.

 

Thanks for your love and support, we will keep you posted on our progress.

 

PS. Our kiddos are doing great and getting so BIG! Tate is adding words to his vocabulary everyday and we couldn't be happier! Emy just started walking a couple weeks ago (she took her time!) and her cute face and smile always lights up our day!

 

We wish all of you a very Merry Christmas!



Maybe I'm not that smart.....

So it's time for an update...We had our home study last week so it looks like we're only a couple of weeks away from being fully approved to begin receiving foster placements! Of course, we're excited about that and also nervous! There is so much unknown in this process and so much potential for heartbreak but we're going ahead with the gamble and trying to focus on all of the exciting positive possibilities and how much we'll be able to learn and grow from the process.

 

This passed week has been quite interesting for me...

Well I don't know if know this but it turns out I'm a brawler. Yep, you heard that right...My Mom and I went shopping just in Tooele Friday night (first mistake) and Tanner kept the kids. We went to Walmart and walked by the electronic section when Mom remembered she needed to get ink. So we turned around and went back and as we went back we saw a man with three kids (an infant, a 2 or three year old and five or six year old) in the photo section and he was screaming in one of the kid's face and then grabbed her by her pigtail and slammed her down into the cart very forcefully. There were a lot of people watching and someone came up to mom and I and asked what they thought we should so. I thought that together we had decided to go tell him that wasn't cool (I know now that it apparently wasn't the decision) So I walked up to him and calmly said; kids don't deserve to be treated like that. They need love and respect. He didn't like that lol surprise surprise. He started screaming in my face calling me every name in the book. At that time, his wife (about 8 times my size I swear) came up to me and joined in with him, she said things like: 'Where are your kids, kids need their moms how about you go home and be with them instead of being at Walmart I can tell leaving them is a normal thing for you' on and on! She even said when you clothe and feed them, you can decide how they should be treated. I was about to say I'd be happy to, how about I call Child Protective Services right now, but I think Heavenly Father was the only one controlling what I said because I never yelled, I never put them down personally I basically just kept saying over and over that they're just little children who deserve to be treated better. Then mom came from around the corner, grabbed my arm and took me away. I was pretty much freaking out. The guy was getting closer and closer to me and totally could've taken me out. A small part of me wanted him to because then I knew cops would be called and those kids would end up in a safer situation. It was obvious he was either high or drunk.

 

I know that I didn't handle it the best way, I could've been hurt, and the kids could've been hurt more. But I really didn't know what to do in the moment and I did know I wasn't going to just stand there and do nothing. I've decided that next time I'll pull out my camera phone and call authorities. But I did realize maybe I don't want to take Tooele cases. Can you imagine running into an angry dad like that at Walmart while you have custody of his kids?! No thanks.

 

At church the next day, I was in the hall during class (don't judge) and a man from the other ward came out and was carrying a screaming child who kept saying: 'I'll be good, I'll be good!' He carried him out of the door kicking and screaming. I watched the man carry him out to his car and begin spanking him hard and repeatedly. That's SO not ok with me, with our church or with anyone I like to associate with. WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING?! I don't really know what to do! I'm thinking of just staying home from now on, it seems easier! But, like the guy in Walmart, I'm not OK with just letting it go unnoticed and unmentioned.

 

Children are THE most precious people on this earth. They are pure, clean spirits and they are of the greatest importance. It is our job to protect all children. If you know of a child being mistreated, call DCFS, they have the goal to keep children safe, but they also want them to be with their parents. They will help parents gain the knowledge and tools to treat their kids with love and parent in a healthy way. If we all work together, we can help kids be safer.
 Utah's Phone Number for DSFS:1-855-323-DCFS (3237)


Carseats and bunkbeds and babygates! oh my!

Becoming a foster parent is exhausting.

Tanner and I have just completed the 2nd of 8 4-hour classes required to become foster, and hopefully adoptive parents and let me tell you....there is A LOT to do! Will it be worth it? I've been told it is and I really, really hope so...it's so much! But if we're able to help one little person, it'd be worth it all. 

Here's the 'short list' of our preparations....

1. Get a home phone

2. 3 first aid kits of 60 pieces each

3. a SPECIFIC fire extinguisher, that's TOUGH to find

4. a crib set up

5. A bunk bed set up

6. 2 empty dressers

7. our kiddos sharing a room

8. a new van that seats at least 7 

(bought it Thursday for $3500 big ones and it's AWESOME, we can tell Heavenly Father is blessing us in the process.)

9. Get yet another baby gate for all of our millions of stairs

10. Lock up every chemical and pill or something that looks like a pill, under lock and key

11. Build a railing around our front porch

12. Have an available car seat of every size...just in case we get a kiddo that size

13. Re arrange all of our storage in the basement over 2 more feet so it's not within 4 ft of our furnace (even though there's a wall between the two)

14. provide copies of life, home, health, auto insurance, marriage certificates, W2s, tax returns, pay stubs, CPR training...I know I'm missing something....

15. THEN after all of that, they can decide whether or not we're good enough parents personality wise, so ya we could do all of it and never be placed with a child.

But, what keeps me going? What makes us buy more car seats than one could dream up? 

Thinking about where my future child might be right now, when he or she might have had their last meal, how many times he or she might be yelled at, hit at, spanked, completely forgotten, and sadly...worse....

There are little ones out there who need a safe haven, and I don't care how many baby gates I need to find, if I can help just one little person, I'll do it ten times over.